Friday, July 15, 2011

wedding bliss :: special guest

Today's topic is "Wedding Bliss," and I can't think of anyone better to take on today's post than Lindsey from Random Acts of Brackett. Lindsey has 3 beautiful little girls and will be celebrating 9 years of marriage in just a few days... if she can't take on the "Wedding Bliss" topic, I don't know who can. Lindsey and I were just getting to know one another before I moved to Louisville, but I have thoroughly enjoyed continuing our friendship via the blogosphere. She is an incredibly gifted writer with a knack for keeping things real. I admire her transparency and honesty and think you will too. Be sure to head over to Random Acts of Brackett and say hello! Enjoy...

I'm not sure blissful really describes my marriage. My wedding yes. It was fairy tale, story book, picture album perfect. People still tell me how good the food was. I didn't really get to eat any of it, so I just take their word for it.

Weddings are blissful, especially if you're just a guest and haven't witnessed any Bridezilla moments about hairstyles or catastrophes like misplaced bouquets and musicians who stop playing in the middle of the seating of the mothers.

But marriage? It's work. For nine years we've been trying to understand each other. Idiosyncracies that were charming in those blissful eighteen months of courtship are now grounds for arguments.

He always has to wait on me. To find my keys. To find my phone. To talk to my friends. To finish a book. To finish watching a movie before he could ask the most important question of our lives.

He's a very patient man, my husband. Except when he's asked our children to do the same thing more than twice. Then he's a little impatient but that's understandable. Five year olds just don't operate on the same frantic time schedule as the rest of us. Which I keep trying to remind him.

But he's never frantic (even when we’re late). Sometimes I wish he was so I wouldn't be alone in my freak out sessions. Then again, I guess if he were falling apart too, there would be no one to put me back together.

We participated in a Bible study a few years ago about marriage and how couples enter into it with desires, but along the way, those desires become expectations and the unfullfillment of those now expectations is what drives away any hope of marital bliss.

I've fallen victim to that. I expected a bigger house by now. Nicer furniture. More disposable income. Less stress.

Instead I have a cozy brick ranch we can't sell, an IKEA sofa with marker stains, and a budget that gets tigher every month. And lots of reason to stress.

But I also have three little girls with their daddy's mile-long eyelashes.

And sometimes on a Saturday morning they all wind up in our bed giggling and tickling and making all those small annoyances a bit smaller.

And I have my moment of bliss.


Jaimie said...

Lindsey, Julia was right: you are REAL, honest and transparent. I love that. I got married about six weeks ago, and we're beginning to realize the reality of it all: we married a sinful human being with faults very much like our own. But we've also realized the power of forgiveness in our relationship. If it wasn't for God's love and forgiveness that he gives us through Jesus, I'd hate to see where we'd be in a few years! But I know we'll have many years of joy (and frustration, and sorrow, and stress)--with those moments of bliss. :)

Thank you for this encouragement!! :)
(Also, you have a handsome husband and absolutely beautiful little girls!)

Lo @ Not Your Average Southern Belle said...

This was absolutely beautiful!

Garretts said...

as always, my thanks for keeping it real, lindsey. you've helped us all find a little more bliss these days!

happy early anniversary!