31 day series on change mainly thinking about the sheer amount of overwhelming change going on in our lives currently... pursuing adoption... buying a house... renovating said-house... job transitions... new leadership roles... etc, etc. One thing I didn't really expect to think much about was my own inner-battle with change itself.
I fight change.
I do. I didn't really realize it before... but I do. My natural inclination is to fight what feels different... to fight the unknown... to fight anything outside of my comfort zone. I like consistency. I value routine. I appreciate preparedness. And when I can't get those things, I kind of freak out. Like, pure-overwhelming-anxiety-attack-freak-out. It wasn't really until this 31 day series that I truly realized my desire to fight change.
And it's not that I don't believe that change can be a good thing... because I do. I mean, honestly... all of our overwhelming changes are good things right now... adoption- duh... new house- yes... renovating said-house- of course...
So, why do I still fight it?
Because it's unknown. Because I can't plan for it. Because it's beyond my control. And I'm finally beginning to learn, that it's that place of vulnerability that is the very best place to be.
For the month of October I'm doing a 31-day series on "change." Go here to see the full line-up of "change" posts.